I dont even know why am I so emotional, is it the post effect of period? or is it that I always keep everything inside for too long that right now I cant endure it anymore?
I didnt let go? Am I sellfish? Trying to be better? Too much pressure? Too much hoping? Sad because of my eye candy? I, myself, have no idea...
Hmm. Kalau di fikir kan, its not that I have major problem sgt. This is all duniawi. Tapi manusia kn, selalu penting kan duaniawi. Im trying to balance jua lah.
I dont know where Im headed to. I dont feel happy and just right now I realize I am running away from something, something that I dont know what is it. I am confuse.
Going to work eventhough its weekend, spending so much time at work. Spending time with cousin. Sleep, the circle goes on. Theres nothing that make me looking forward on the next day. Boring life. Waaa I sound so pathetic right now.
There are alot of things in my mind while Im typing this post. haha. I dont know how to express myself.
Im clueless of what I want right now. I will find my answer to whats happening. I hope I can solve all of this and find peace.
Wish me luck!
Tuesday, July 23, 2013,7/23/2013
*cough-cough* lol behabuk sudah blog ku ne. oh yaa. haiii everyone!!! *wave* hahaha as if ada urg baca lgi blog ne hahahahaa. *ckp dengan diri sndri* lol.
while i decided to active kn balik my twitter, i realize arh my profile ada link to my blog and for 2 days i manage to read all the entry that i've post.
How embarassing.... *tutup muka* my last post was in 2010! hahahahahaa eyeerrr dh lah lame, benda inda penting pun kn di post, grammar byk salah, and offcourse emo tu kdg berigali haha ogay2 why am I criticize myself? HAHA.
Im thinking kan delete this blog actually but then syg jua. atleast right now when i decided to read back my post, terclick jua ohhh this is wat happen last time.... especially my entry about hajj. i think atu yg paling precious. Memories~ te-recall jua balik and thats what make me glad and remind me how lucky i am penah pegi ke sana.
Year 2013 my concerned masa new year IS for me to decide either to further my studies or working. pokoknya... facing new challenge lg. many things had happened ofcourse. Dont want to talk about the past but some of the highlight is offcourse about someone special. never that i thought this year we..... sigh. i have a good memories for the past 3 ++years with him. cuma ujung2 yg paling sakit when he decided to break our relationship. Then i dono what went wrong but we still in a good term wf each other tho. its just hard for me to move on since i dont have any strong reason why i should stop. Well, I guess belum ada jodoh. and i duno inside story... but he told me that there's no one else and right now his going to focus on his own business. because of this too, i become more stronger with positive minded. i believe there is always a reason for anything that happen, for meeting someone... its either he/she will change you or you will change that someone. its just a matter of time and insyallah. I dont want to think much and just go with a flow.
right now i think its better for me to build my career dlu. ohh because of the matter above, masa masih frust... time atu jua lh registration untuk poly buka. kurang asamm bnar hahaha batah tgu registration buka but then time buka skajap saja masa nya. but its my fault jua im not blaming 100% psal tym tu frust. me, myself nda push kan check closing date register nya, i do check but inda ku notice bnr... lol -_- plus i have to think, if dpt tgal bandar, and mcm2. so biar la dlu. i just continue working and next year apply insyallah liat situation :)
what else... aaaa another highlight lagi. im currently trying to gain back my confidence ^.^v since sama 'ia' slowly my weight naik, naik and naik hahaha happy berabiz. before hajj i rajin la jogg but then lama2 mls and complain panas. haha but now i feel motivated kan turun kan balik. heyy its for my own good and offcourse i want to pkai baju lawaa lawaaaa kekeke. alhamdulilah i've lost 17kg now. so another 15kg to go. :) fyi. seluar jeans ku smua na dpt pkai dh. smua tegugur tym ku pakai hahahaha crap and baju kurung ku malas ku ckp mkin bida plang rasa ku hahaha my bro ckp kubut2. and ada baju ne brapa tahun dh rh almari na pnah bepakai psal no confidence... finally dpt pkai keke. i hope i can reach my target end of the year or january 2014. gambate nad!!!
uh ohh its 6.07am dh. nasib inda kerja today but then i have an eye appointment later. lazyyyyy siuk lagi kaja haha i love my work actually right now its just the pay not satisfying, i think i deserve more. but my parent advice, jgn memilih that atu rezeki dri Allah. so yeah... but im still in a process antar2 cv rh other company ne kekekeke. but i know i miss sana nnt if one day pindah. yg boring sana psal ya detail berabis. i dont want to mention d company name psal takut if di google kluar my post HAHA apakan merepek. but yth. bukan saja ketara ku mengumpat nnt. krg tebaca post ku emo2 krg hahahahaaja maluu. lain la mmg urg tmasuk n baca post ne haha. cuba imagine. mesti ada urg google company name ne... most posibility is if urg kn interview kaja sini. so mesti durang buat research kn hahahaabajaa overrrrrr. think far ogay xp ohhh d sana jua ada this kiyott guy wf spec (my type) ;) my friend ckp, " i know why u like him. coz he look like ur ex! " haha -.-" well both use spec recently ia pkai spec sama wf my ex lgi hahaa mmm atu plang yg sama for me. yg lain nda la~~ ada2 saja my friend tu (again i dont want to mention d name hahahaa paranoid) -.-"" kiyot plang ia hmm i want to know more but i dont think dpt lagi due to something :s and again i dont know what went wrong. why am i so clueless??? *smackself* hahaha ntah lah. biartia x? wish i can help to change him slowly as wat i said mybe ada reason for anything that happen p biartiaaaaa. i enjoyyy liat saja my eye candyy lol. oh enough for today. nnti if ku stop and baca next 2 years. ketawa2 x ku xp but here i try to make it less emo xp na tau la HaHAHa. merepekkk. ogay kn liat sailormoon dlu aww tuxedo bertopenggg hahaahaha mwahzzzz!!! anyway mls ku cek balik apa ku tulis so if cm merepek or apa ka biartia wawawa. kn tdurrrrrr p malas haha udah2 merepek. chiowwww
Tuesday, May 4, 2010,5/04/2010
Tomorrow will be our last day for final exam. Wish me luck :D
Saturday, January 2, 2010,1/02/2010
si 33 <3
you know that feeling? that feeling when you just want the right thing to fall into the right place, not only because it's right, but because it will mean that such a thing is still possible? i want to believe that.
Friday, October 23, 2009,10/23/2009
You Was Like A Drug To Me
think how different it will be if you never met the one person who changed your life.
im glad that i found you.
thank you so much... for coming into my life, for everything.